musings

the year ahead is slowly beginning to take shape. looks like I’ll be leaving my beloved mountain village and returning to the hustle, bustle and tussle of the city. opportunities keep arising, and a good pal has come thru with a great house to rent in a solid, convenient location. it’ll be a bit of a culture shock for me as it’s in what I would term ‘the burbs’. in my years in sydney, I’ve never lived anywhere west of balmain peninsula, so this will be a big change. but it’s near the guitar store, where I’m considering picking up teaching again. and it’s not as far a commute from gigland, from where I’m feeling a little disconnected of late.

sometimes the writing just appears on the walls. the guesthouses that I’ve been doing some casual chefwork at are both going thru major management changes. the owners of my local pub have canned all live music as part of a new sweeping “cost-saving move” (and we all know where that economic rationalization usually leads…..). so the winds of change seem to be blowing me back down the hill. the new house is large enough to comfortably set up the recording gear again, and then I’ll have no excuses not to get back to this album that seems to haunt me.

my son callum is here for a few days. we celebrated his 14th birthday yesterday with lunch at my old pal james’ cafe in mudgee. it felt a little odd to be back in that town again, it’s been just over seven years since I moved away. it felt comfortable and foreign at the same time. I’m enjoying having some dad-and-son time again.

another year draws to a close and with it, a confusing and messy decade. from reading friend’s various comments on facebook & twitter, it seems to be an opinion shared by many.

for me, the new millenium started with optimism. I was sharing my life with a wonderful woman, I was working for a cool music dotcom and playing the nashville songwriter’s circuit. less than a year later, the relationship had ended, the dotcom had folded, I was hospitalised with a heart attack and my kids were on the phone begging me to come back to australia.

the decade unfolded unpredictably as I floated between town and country, trying to find something to hang onto. the upsides: I turned my long-growing passion for food into a new profession and a second career. I got to spend some great time with my rapidly growing kids, and enjoyed being a true step-parent.

the downsides: I lost my way, musically. the love of writing, recording and performing became a distant and disjointed memory. I also lost several close friends, who all went far too early from cancer-related illnesses and diseases. it was a big motivation for me to rekindle my dreams.

I spent the better part of the decade with my best friend, partner, companion, lover, confidante. it finally drew to its natural close right at the end of the decade. I wish her well. And I reconnected with an old friend whose path was paralleling mine, and with this, I may have found my true soulmate.

so now I venture forth into my fifth decade, with renewed hope, love and optimism.